Rules Of Etiquette To Uphold During A Rabbi Funeral

By Harold Lee


Jewish traditional funeral practices are a bit different from what most people are acquainted with. To begin with, the Jews bury their loved ones at least 24 hours following their death. This means that wakes and body viewing ceremonies are not a usual thing, though family members take part in Keriah. This means tearing a black ribbon or a cloth of visible color in honor of the memories of the deceased. This shows their sorrow during a rabbi funeral.

In case you are not a Jew, it certainly is important for you to know what to expect during the funeral and also what is expected of you. First, it is okay to be there for your friend, though it is adequate to say less or even nothing at all to the mourners. Even if a mourner engages you, choose to say as little as possible and perhaps focus on finding out more about the deceased.

When choosing your dress code, you can settle for a smart casual outfit. Make sure your footwear is sensible, especially if you will be visiting the graveside. It is also ideal to get to the funeral at least 30 minutes ahead of time to offer your condolences. According to the Jewish tradition, the family directly leaves the chapel for the cemetery or the cemetery to their homes. You do not want to be that person holding them up after the service.

If you arrive at the chapel before the service starts, get sited. You can also talk in low tones with the people next to you as long as you maintain a low key. This would also be the best time to switch off your phone to avoid interruptions once the service begins.

Your presence alone means everything so you can just sit and listen. The person conducting prayers and psalms will have been chosen ahead of time as well as the person reading the eulogy. Once the stories of the deceased rabbi are shared, you can expect moments of laughter even in the heart of the somberness of saying goodbye to a beloved soul.

Rabbi final services often take place in a chapel and not at the graveside. In case you are not a close family member of the deceased, there is no need for you to attend the graveside service. After all, lowering the casket will only take about ten minutes. There will be limited chairs, and these are mainly meant for the mourners.

Jews host a Shiva about seven days after the funeral. If you choose to attend the home gathering, again, the most important thing is your presence and it is okay to stay for half an hour or less before leaving. Bringing some food with you is a good gesture because it will save the family from shopping and cooking as they grieve. Simply avoid meat and shellfish and play safe if you do not know the Jewish food laws.

The Jews laws command followers to be good when they breath. You may hence not hear talks about the afterlife. Consequently, do not raise such topics. It also pays to understand that you may not see a lot of flowers in rabbi funerals and if you need to make a kind gesture, you could make a donation in the honor of the deceased.




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